Driving Horses

This morning I went for a horsecart ride.

At 9:30, I went to Brenda's house to take a ride on her 1890 horsecart with her two horses. She calls it "driving horses." Aren't they beautiful?


We -- well, actually, she -- brushed and groomed her horses, harnessed them up to the cart and off we went. Down to the docks, over to Scott's Neck and into the hunt fields. It was a beautiful day. We walked, trotted and made our way through the roads, trails, fields.


There is something about experiencing nature from a horsecart. You just see things differently than if you were in a car. Or even a bike. For me, it's even a different sense from running or walking through these fields. Maybe it's because the horses are doing the work, and their effort leaves me free to be completely open to the sensory experience -- the way the air smells, the warmth of the sun on my skin, the clumps of holly in the woods. What a magnificient day!

Thank you Brenda!!

Valentine's Day!

This was our first Valentine's Day together...and my first as a non-single person. (When you are single, and especially when you are not in a relationship, Valentine's Day can be brutal, happy couples everywhere, where even dysfunctional couples feign happiness.)

We went to a really fun party. The idea was that everyone who attended would bring a poem, a song or a toast about love to share with the group. Here are some goodies from the party...don't they look fun?

It felt so special -- the house was decorated (we even had Valentine heart toilet paper in the bathroom!), fire roaring, people wearing red, delicious food, it was all so festive.

The first speech was the story about how one couple met. Then we had a poem, a song, lots of poems ranging from a poet from the Low Country to a 17th century metaphysical poet! One of the ladies wanted all of us gals to sing and dance to "Ain't No Mountain High Enough," which we did.

Landon and I danced to the Bobby Darin song MORE, which was our wedding dance, while my computer faintly put out the music and the guests tried to sing along. Landon played the guitar and sang a song which, when he sings it to me, always makes me cry. (What he didn't tell the group was that he added a verse to the song, the last verse, which he wrote for me, while on an airplane taking him to meet up with me on our first public "date," which happened to be his sister's memorial service in Boston. Landon and I have had a lot of "loss" to navigate in our relationship, but it's only made us stronger.) It was down to the final guest -- the guys at the table were teasing the last person yet to speak saying, "Wow. That's a tough act to follow. What do you have?" That's when he spoke poignantly and openly about his relationship with his wife, speaking straight from the heart, which ended up being one of the most courageous and moving sharings of the evening.

My first Valentine's Day was a winner! The best part was spending the whole day with Landon -- we had a blast -- and culminating in that very special evening with very special people. I am grateful. And, I feel SO loved.

The Ladies of Brays

The ladies of Brays Island have been so kind to me. In the past week, here’s is how they have reached out: (NOTE: there are many more than the women mentioned here -- I'm just covering what happened in one week's time)

Charlene gave me a brochure for a women’s group that meets in Charleston. (She’s a former New Yorker and knows how much I miss the interaction of the city, I think.)

Peggy gave me the book The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society because she thought I’d enjoy reading it. “It’s so light, she said.

Marcia invited me to participate with a group of people who have hired a special horse trainer from North Carolina because she knows that I’m just learning to ride.

Ann gave me a great book to read called Against the Tide by Harriet Keyserling, about a New York Jewish woman who came to Beaufort, SC and later became a member of the State House of Representatives. I’m on the chapter where she just leaves New York for Beaufort.

And, there are so many more...Deb, Penny, Ann, Sara, Sharon, Barbara, Marcia, Laura, Barbara, Zelda, Lainey, Susan, Janet, Mary, Linda, Marianne, Sally, Liz, Sandy, Gaye, Cathy...and on and on and on...the danger of listing is that I might have left someone out. Please forgive me if I have.

So, I’m grateful to these ladies who have all reached out in a way that has touched me. In their gift-giving, they seem to acknowledge the enormous shift in my life that has required me to leave the city that I love for the man that I love. It wasn’t much of a choice, I’m happy to be with the man I adore, but there is a sense of loss in leaving the place that still represents so much for me – hopes, dreams, aspirations, activity, creativity, friends, family, familiarity.

Small gestures like these fill the cold, dark spaces in my heart, the holes of loss, like stones from the glowing hearth, heating and bringing renewed warmth and bringing my soul peace. I am grateful.